today I learned what is responsible for our happiness.
50% is our set line (i.e. what you are born with), 10% is life circumstances (wealth, where you live, job, etc.) and 40% is up to you. So it's in your control if you choose how happy you choose to be with that 40%. Now I don't really know how encouraging I find this. I mean - wouldn't it suck if you were born with a low "set line" because there is nothing you could do. So if you had a high set line you have the potential to be 100% happy. But if you are born with a lower set line, all you would ever be able to achieve was 70% happiness. And what if you love someone, a partner, friend, child who has a low set point. Imagine loving someone who doesn't have the potential to be as happy as you. That seems a little bit depressing to me. Now - who knows how accurate this is, or how people can know something like that (source montioring note: W5) - but I think that there is some truth to it. How often have you heard someone refer to a person, or a child, who is just a happy person, child etc. There are people who are justs predisposed to happiness.
And there are people who go to Jacob and find out that everything in the store is 30% this week and who use that to maximize that other 40%.
Showing posts with label happiness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label happiness. Show all posts
Saturday, July 22, 2006
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
inside/outside/happiness
A long time ago (ago not that long) I made the decision that if I have a choice between being happy and being not happy to choose to be happy.
And a lot of times one can make a decision to move from being not happy to being happy. Most of the time the decision is internal. but occasionally it is external.
Like when Dan Savage tells a gay man in a town of 17 in the American midwest to move to a big city. At some point no matter how many choices you make inside - the environment might make it completely impossible to actually be happy.
The flip side of that is people who try to run away from their unhappiness. People for whom it is easier to move across the world than to address what is going on inside. But evenutally it catches up with you and you have to move again. etc.
And sometimes it is hard to know which is which. When to cut and run and when the problem is internal. Usually my problems are internal - but there is an occasion or two where I have to reflect an internal decision with an external change.
In order to know what you should do you have to trust yourself. And until you figure out what to do - you have to trust that you know yourself well enough that eventually you will figure it out. And lucky for me - I trust myself.
And a lot of times one can make a decision to move from being not happy to being happy. Most of the time the decision is internal. but occasionally it is external.
Like when Dan Savage tells a gay man in a town of 17 in the American midwest to move to a big city. At some point no matter how many choices you make inside - the environment might make it completely impossible to actually be happy.
The flip side of that is people who try to run away from their unhappiness. People for whom it is easier to move across the world than to address what is going on inside. But evenutally it catches up with you and you have to move again. etc.
And sometimes it is hard to know which is which. When to cut and run and when the problem is internal. Usually my problems are internal - but there is an occasion or two where I have to reflect an internal decision with an external change.
In order to know what you should do you have to trust yourself. And until you figure out what to do - you have to trust that you know yourself well enough that eventually you will figure it out. And lucky for me - I trust myself.
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